Get Rich Quick : Create your Own FAD Diet

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I am currently designing a class for my students on the Red Flags of Fad Diets. I have been fascinated over the latest and greatest lengths dieters will take for the quick fix. My creative juices got involved: Here is my first Lecture…

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GET RICH QUICK

This is 100% guaranteed. A idiot-proof guide to make tons of money. It has never failed. Create your own FAD Diet. All you need are the right tools… Here are the secrets.

INTRODUCTION

Please note: This is a do it yourself project. It is fail proof. It is guaranteed to make you rich. There are no tricks, you do not need any special qualifications.

CHECKLIST OF EQUIPMENT:

Pen or pencil & Paper (or if you are good at typing right into the computer, then all you need is a computer).

You will eventually need a publisher, but because this is fail proof, and publishers will be making quite a large cut from your profits, those will be a dime a dozen.

QUALIFICATIONS:

Although it was determined that you do not NEED ANY credentials, there is a disclaimer: This is especially effective if you have Doctorate degree in something obscure like gemology. That way you can call it the “Dr. Cheatam Diet”. and you’ll be rich.

Here are the basic ingredients you will need to create your own fad diet:

A book that lists the nutritional values of every known food to mankind (this is easy to create, because there are many databases and apps that already do this that you can get permission to reprint).
A fairly good knowledge of what is available in grocery stores (and what is not too)
A bag of sweet potato chips (you will need a healthy snack while you work).
A picture of someone who was slim 5 years ago, but is now larger.
The larger person has to own an outfit that is at least 10 years old.
Air brush software

What you will NOT need:

No nutritional knowledge whatsoever.

STEP 1: Selecting the “magic” secret behind your diet

When choosing the method for your fad diet you will need your book of nutrition. Look in your book and find a measure of nutrition that is irrelevant to everyday life. Here are some good examples of methods for a fad diet:

The “all Magnesium you want” diet
The “Magnesiun is making you fat” diet.
“I Ironed away 50 pounds”
“Pumping irony and Consuming Iron”
“Polyprotrexebate- the supplement guaranteed to reduce body fat by at least 20%”
“Acrolyte polymer causes obesity”

Disclaimer : You cannot use fat, carbohydrates, or fiber because a famous Doctor has already claimed the trademark to each of them.

STEP 2 : Selecting your FAD diet Food items

When choosing the menu for your fad diet you will need your list of items that they have at the grocery store. Using this list, you must follow these rules:

Menu items cannot be carried by a regular grocery store. Select specific health food

stores, since their items tend to enhance gullability.

Examples:

Hoodia and Acai used to be good examples of fad diet ingredients but may be too common.

Molasses might be used on bulgar wheat.

Frozen rutabaga and starfruit are good ideas to accompany an arugula salad.

Menu items must be unlikely to be kept in ones pantry.

Examples:

Bananas are a good idea because they spoil.

Dairy products because their expiration is within a few days.

Frozen foods are good also because they will tie up freezer space and prevent probability of storing ice cream.

Items should sound sort of healthy, but it is fine if they are not. Items should also have minimal appeal:

Examples:

Cottage cheese is an excellent example of this

Wheat Thins are good.

Plain yogurt is just bland enough.

Castor oil is also effective.

Serving sizes must be extremely small. Particularly of the items one would need to purchase in bulk. Best if this item is useless for everyday consumption or spoils quickly.

Examples:

1/8 of a pound of ground bison.

One 1/8″ slice of kiwi.

¼ cup of puffed rice.

Two teaspoons of un-milled bulgar wheat.

1 teaspoon of dark molasses.

3 loganberries.

Items must be repulsive (this has the advantage of enhancing appetite suppressance). For these items in particular, you can increase the portion size and for some meals allow for unlimited amounts

Examples:

Red cabbage is unlimited, as it is a hidden source of phytocarageenan!

6 cans of popeye creamed spinach.

12 oz of braized goat liver

Tuesdays: eat all of the boiled crawfish you want.

STEP 3: The Diet Schedule

Disclaimer: Ease Will Please

Time Span for expected results

Select a very short time span. Too long of a span will ensure loss of interest too quickly. Too short of a timespan and the dieter will not be able to punish themselves enough.

Perfect timespan is thus around a window of 3 or 4 days.

Weight Reduction

Select a guaranteed weight reduction expectation. Most people realistically realize that could not physically lose more than 5 pounds per day, thus keep your guarantee a fraction shy of that.

Disclaimer: Although 3 or 4 pounds a day is reasonable, ensure your guarantee is viable, thus give a range rather than an exact number. A large range of weight loss will provide more confidence in obtaining goals. And put an official sounding disclaimer in there for good measure. Here are some examples:

Lose up to 15 pounds in 4 days! (Actual weight loss ranges from 6 – 14 pounds depending on the person, their metabolism, and the digestibility of the phytotetracarotene encountered).
Follow Dr. Art Ritis’s program and see a skinny mirror image (You may experience some joint pain but if you suck it up skinny overrrides joint pain).

Step 4. Plan the Menu

Planning the specific menu should include taking each meal and eliminate one aspect from a normal meal. Remember to use your ingredients and the rules you have set in the above steps.

Examples:

Regular Breakfast	Fad Diet Breakfast
1 Cup Milk	3 cups unpasteurized goat milk
Piece of Toast	French water cracker
Eggs and Fruit	Free Range ostrich Egg and 1/8” slice Kiwi
Turkeylink	—- no replacement —-
Coffee, milk and Honey	Coffee (optional) 2 tsp coconut yogurt Or 2 tsp raw cane sugar)

Lunch	Fad Diet Lunch
Salad	1/3 of a Freze lettuce, purple cabbage Dress with fresh grated lemon peel and ground pomegranate seeds
Soup	Purple Cabbage soup
Whole grain turkey sandwich	—— no replacement —-
V8 Tomato juice	Juiced papino seeds and molasses

Dinner	Fad Diet Dinner
Mashed Potatoes	—
Roast Beef	26 ounces of Liverwurst
Carrots	1/2 endive sauted in palm oil
Chocolate cake	Pineapple flavored unpasteurized cottage cheese Enriched with phytotetra zinc

Final Steps : Add testimonials

Examples:

I lost 13 pounds between Monday and Thursday and you can too! (Include disclaimer: each individual may experience different results. However Ms. Ann Orexia is an average person that has never excelled at anything).

I was not even born the weight I am now. This is a miracle that changed my life. Thank you Dr. D. Menshea.

I have tried everything. This is the first time a diet has ever worked for me. I love that I can eat as much as I want, and not have to exercise. I have gotten used to the rule of not swallowing.

SUMMARY:

When you are done publish your diet in the form of a book. Use the pictures of your athletic friends as “after” shots. Now is a good time to haul out that air brush software if necessary.

Some extra tips:

Amazon.com is a good resource for best sellers.

Probably nothing in the world arouses more false hopes than the first four hours of a diet. By that time, you have made the sale, and you are home free.

Have your friends provide some believable testimonials and submit the diet summary into a Health and Fitness Magazine. These are not peer-reviewed and they are often looking for creative journalism, so although this is an extra step, it is relatively simple.

Research studies may provide additional credibility, so look up some key words in peer reviewed journals such as the Minnesota Journal of Medicine, quote some studies that include your special ingredient in the title. Eg: if you selected phytoquadracarotene magnesium as your specific ingredient (see STEP 3 above), then a study titled “Carotene and magnesium eaten simultaneously improves eye health,” is appropriate.

APRIL 2022NEWSLETTER

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Its April, and that means warmer temperatures. With the change of season, we are soon going to be experiencing the heat and humidity. Well, what does this mean in the world of nutrition? You got it, the importance of hydration!! Not that hydration is less important in winter, however, with the heat it is often more difficult to stay hydrated. My main point is, do not rely on thirst as an indicator

You should become accustomed to consuming fluids without feeling “thirsty”. Enough fluid should be consumed so that your urine is a clear color. Dark yellow, means drink more, and brown, means see your physician.

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Prescription for Life

Water is without a doubt the most important component in our diet. Proper hydration not only allows the body to maintain structural and biochemical integrity, but it also prevents overheating, through sensible heat loss (perspiration). Many physically active people may have experienced the affects of acute fluid deficiency on a hot day, better known as heat exhaustion. Dehydration can furthermore, be a long term problem.

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Fitness Corner

If you have been to the stores recently, I am sure you would have noticed that bathing suits, tanks, and shorts are covering the mannequins!

The feeling ofspring fever is certainly enduced! So, why not take advantage of your lunch period, grab a few co-workers, and get some vitamin D in the sunlight? Take 15 – 30 minutes of your lunch break and sneak in some walking! Moving about will help re-energize your body and brain to burn calories and be more productive when you return to your work.

It’s not too early to start hitting the pools, either. Get bathing suit ready before the outdoor pools open.

Swimming has some great benefits:

S Aerobic exercise without heavy impact on the joints and skeletal system

S Increases muscle strength and tone through resistance

S Has been shown to improve bone strength, especially in post-menopausal women

S Utilizes full range of motion for increased flexibility

S Gives your heart a great workout which, in turn, helps increase circulation

S Burns calories to help you maintain or lose weight

S Can help reduce exercise-induced asthma for some

S It can improve cholesterol and lower the risk of developing diabetes

S Causes the body to release endorphins which make you feel good

S Can create the same relaxation that yoga does as it focuses on breathing

S Can activate a process in the brain that allows the brain to replace cells destroyed by stress

Most club pool facilities offer a variety of swimming activities so you can find one that suits you, such as: laps, open pool, and water aerobics.

Interested in some group training, and setting some ultimate or “bucket list” goals?

Now is a great time to join a sports club… so many options available.

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April is Also Alcohol Awareness Month

Spring fever also induces the joy of sitting on an out door deck, enjoying a Rita or two…

Keep these tips in mind, when approaching temptation:

S Moderate consumption provides little, if any, health benefits to younger people

S The risks of alcohol abuse increase when drinking starts at an early age

S Drink in moderation: no more than 1 drink/day for women and 2 drinks/day for men.

S Alcohol is considered dangerous when consumed in excess

S One drink a day may increase the risk of breast cancer

S According to a study in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition, alcohol consumed during meals may promote overeating

S Consumption may increase triglycerides in the blood

S For those with diabetes or reactive hypoglycemia and other conditions, consumption can cause low blood sugar

S For athletes, alcohol consumption after a workout may diminish protein synthesis leading to decreased muscle growth

S In general, alcoholic beverages contain little beneficial nutrients but plenty of calories

Calorie Corner

How do you take your coffee? You might be surprised how those calories can add up from sugar, cream, milk, flavored syrups, etc. when you order your latte at your favorite coffeehouse. The next time you order, here are some tips to help you get a delicious flavor without all the extra calories:

S Ask for non-fat milk (or soy milk if you cannot drink milk)

S Consider ordering something the size of a Grande or smaller.

S Not only are you watching calories but maybe expenses so choose certain days of the week as your coffeehouse days.

Consider only getting specialty coffee on M/W/F or T/Th/Sa to save you time, money, and calories.

S Always skip the whip

S If you are ordering a flavored latte, consider asking for:

1 pump of syrup in a Tall (they usually get 3 pumps)
1 – 2 pumps of syrup in a Grande (they usually get 4 pumps)
3 pumps of syrup in a Venti (they usually get 5 pumps)

S Different syrups at different coffeehouses have different amounts of calories. At Starbucks:

1 pump flavored syrup = 20 calories
1 pump mocha = 25 calories
1 pump Pumpkin Spice syrup = 38 calories
1 pump white mocha = 60 calories

S Let’s compare:

1 Regular Tall Pumpkin Spice Latte with 2% milk and whip cream on top:	1 Tall Pumpkin Spice Latte with non-fat milk, no whip cream, and only 1 pump of syrup:
= 300 calories	= 130 calories
Drink it every day of the week	Drink it every day of the week
= 2100 calories	= 910 calories

S That’s over 1,000 calories saved by cutting down on the added sugar and fat.

[Who loves there coffee?? mmmm…. mmmme… ME]

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Recipe Selection of the Season

Spring Raspberry Sensation

1 pt. (2 cups) raspberry sorbet or sherbet
1 cup cold fat free milk
1 pkg. Sugar Free Vanilla Instant Pudding
1 tub (8 oz.) COOL WHIP FREE Whipped Topping, thawed
1 cup raspberries

LINE 9×5-inch loaf pan with foil. Spoon sorbet into pan; freeze 10 min.

POUR milk into large bowl. Add dry pudding mix. Beat with wire whisk 2 min. or until well blended. Gently stir in whipped topping. Spread pudding mixture over sorbet in pan.

FREEZE 3 hours or overnight. To unmold, invert pan onto plate; remove foil. Top with raspberries just before serving. Let stand 10 to 15 min. to soften before cutting into 12 slices.

Per serving: Calories100; Protein 2g; Fat1g;

Carbohydrates 15g; Sodium 130mg; Saturated fat 1g; Cholesterol 0mg

ILANA

IRONMAN CHATTANOOGA!!

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Hi Ilana!
Wanted to thank you again for helping me out with my weight and nutrition!

I had the best race so far thanks to you!! Using Gatorade endurance on bike and gels on the run worked perfectly! I’m still logging my food and eating the same lol!! My weight has stabilized and I feel great!

Huge hugs to you!!! Thank you for the encouragement and guidance-it was so frustrating in the beginning but you knew it would kick in! Putting my trust in the process and your advice worked

Thank you-thank you!!!!!

Stephanie. B.

CORONA VIRUS – NUTRITIONALLY SPEAKING!

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In all this craziness we are all experiencing together, there is certainly a reminder of how valuable good health and immunity is. Who (W.H.O, haha, no pun intended) would have dreamed that in 2020 instead of flying around in hovercrafts we are teaching eachother how to wash our hands. We are also constantly being reminded of how regular exercise and healthy eating is of immense importance and I bet I am preaching to a group that are on overdrive in that regard. Many of us may be thrown into a even a darker place with all our gyms and pool privileges being denied, races being suspended or canceled. And then the big question – what are you all doing nutrition wise?

Some challenges may include – adjusting to your new normal daily. Some may be in less of an energy deficit because accessibility has changed. Some may be creating more of a deficit because time on our hands, means more time and motivation for get physical.

The difference in energy expenditure between the variety in these can be enormous, and it may be necessary to cut calories on days of reduced training or increase calories on heavier than expected days. Choices of immune-boosting foods may also become a refocus. These small modifications to your daily diet add up and are helpful in maintaining your proper race weight and energy balance while the world around us is wobbling. Furthermore, adjustments like these, along with optimal food choices has more chance of leaning towards immunity boosting versus risk.

Less energy density

On rest days your caloric expenditure is reduced, as little as 100 unused calories per day can add up big over time– a weight increase of 10 lbs per year. Body fat is ballast for an athlete and excess body fat reduces performance and optimal power to weight ratio. To prevent storing unused energy as body fat, replace dense carbohydrate foods such as pasta, bagels, breads and potatoes with lower calorie carbohydrate snacks such as Greek yogurt, cottage cheese, fruits and vegetables. Furthermore, the color in your earthy foods represent a variety of anti-oxidants not only to fight of the free radicals that exercise can produce, but also to boost your immune system to fight the war of the Virus.

Watch the supplements

Energy bars, gels, supplement shakes and other sports nutrition products are not as necessary for lighter days, as they are for heavy training and recovery. On a light training day consider using reduced serving sizes during your work outs. Typically a work out of less than 60-90 minutes at lower intensities will require only water for hydration. You can also modify your recovery or meal replacement shake by substituting ice and water for milk or yogurt in your shakes. Furthermore, staying well hydrated constantly and not just during workouts, keeps your immunity strongest.

Portion control

Portion sizes are one of the biggest factors to control. Reduce portions on lighter days but keep your macro nutrient balance of proteins, carbohydrates and fats in tact. You will find it easier to maintain your body composition balance if your choice of meals and snacks are mainly natural and unprocessed. Fresh or frozen fruits and vegetables, whole grains, lean sources of protein such fish, egg whites, and white meat poultry should make up most of your daily consumption. Egg yolks are mainly saturated fat and removing them on righter days is another way to mitigate excess calories. Tofu and soy products are also a good source of lower calorie, lower fat proteins, especially for vegetarian/vegan athletes. Reducing calories includes eliminating those desserts that you may be able to get away with on heavy training days. Plan your daily menu. Planning helps resist temptation and ensures the availability of the best food choices for weight management. Planning can be as simple as making a grocery list. I get that choices may be limited right now, but consider a daily plan with what you have on hand.

Replenish glycogen stores

Glycogen is the stored from of carbohydrate in the muscles and liver. Your stores of glycogen can quickly become depleted or be reduced slowly over time. It is not unusual to put on several pounds after a few lighter days in glycogen alone, since it contains a lot of water and is therefore heavy. You may find your work out quality is significantly higher after a few light days. This may not only be due to sufficient recovery but is likely a product of increased energy stores. Maintaining an optimal race body while having enough energy to train can be a slippery slope. Glycogen weight can be added very quickly and should not be confused with body fat which comes off and on more slowly. It is important to know your fully replenished weight. If you are eating enough calories on heavy training days glycogen depletion should not be an issue but if you find yourself down a few pounds going into a rest or recovery day cutting calories is not applicable if your goal is weight maintenance.

More immune boosting ideas

Fruits and vegetables with a variety of vibrant colors are naturally high in immune–boosting compounds that are specifically shown to help beat ailments more quickly. Berries in particular, naturally contain A, B, and C and stimulate the immune system. There is a fair amount of research that shows the complex natural sugars in berries support the immune system in fighting cold and flu.

Be consistent!

We will always face a variety of health challenges in our world. The key is not simply responding to this latest one and then moving on. The key is to make your health a priority every day, year after year.

Most importantly – Don’t eat all your quarantine stockpile at once!!

Second most importantly – wear green today to avoid being pinched. If you do not have anything green, then make sure you are a considerable distance away from anyone that could pinch you!!

HAPPY St. PATTY’s DAY!!

MAY 2021 NEWSLETTER

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Did you know that May is Mental Health Month

No matter if you or someone you know struggles with mental illness, proper nutrition and exercise can boost your mood!

If you’re looking to increase your energy, decrease your stress, alleviate anxiety, or up your spirits, you might want to give some of these a try:

Oily fish (example: Mackerel): contain vitamin D which increases serotonin to boost your mood.
Pumpkin and sunflower seeds: rich in omega-3-fatty acids and essential nutrients which can help to reduce symptoms of Depression and Insomnia.
Vanilla ice cream: contains phosphorus that can help increase the libido in some.
Bananas: contain tryptophan which works with serotonin. It also contains potassium, which we may need when stressed, and B6 that helps to regulate sugar levels.
Dark chocolate: causes the brain to release feel-good endorphins and serotonin.
Pasta: contains carbohydrates that increase the production of serotonin.
Cheese: contains tryptophan and calcium, needed to manufacture the sleep-regulating hormone melatonin.
Green, leafy vegetables: contain folic acid. A deficiency of folic acid can result in symptoms of Depression.
Coffee: boosts the metabolism, increases alertness, and can activate the pleasure controls in the brain.
Spicy food: causes the body to release endorphins in response the capsaicin, also known as the spiciness, of say hot tamales.
Wine: in moderation, may promote a feeling of happiness and lower blood pressure.

Interesting tidbit:

A study in Spain over the course of 11 years found that those who ate the most trans fats were 48% more likely to develop depression. To avoid trans-fats, you will want to look for “trans-fat free” products and those that do not contain “partially hydrogenated” in the ingredients list.

Water: insufficient amounts of water, or dehydration, can lead to fatigue, headaches, and memory loss.

Nutrients that are beneficial to mental health disorders:

Amino acids
Antioxidants
Essential Fatty Acids
Omega-3 and Omega-6 Fatty Acids
Vitamins and Minerals: Vitamins B6, B12, folic acid, vitamin D, vitamin C, and vitamin E.

The Art of Mindful Eating

What is it?

Mindful eating is a stress relieving technique or meditative practice that allows you to use all of your senses to enjoy the food you are consuming.

What are the benefits?

- Can decrease the amount of mindless eating a person does which, in turn, possibly reduces the number of calories taken in. When people eat mindlessly, they often snack without realizing how much they have actually consumed.

- It allows the person to truly enjoy their food resulting in an overall sense of satisfaction that may not be found when eating quickly or on-the-go

It also allows the body time to make the brain aware of how full you are. It takes the digestive tract approximately 20 minutes to tell the brain that you are full so you stop eating when satisfied.

How is it done?

Savor your food and pay attention to the various flavors of the ingredients
Analyze the textures of your meal: crunchy or creamy? Dry or juicy?
Meditate on the food. When outside thoughts enter, identify them and then return to the enjoyment of your food.
Listen to your body. Pay attention to when you are no longer hungry and other sensations or tension within your body.

Fitness Corner

Not only can nutrients help boost your mood but so can exercise through various methods:

Releases endorphins that produce a feel-good emotion which is why you may have heard of the term ‘runner’s high’.
Reduces immune system overreactions.
Increases body temperature which can calm some individuals.
Boosts self-confidence.
Acts as a distraction from worry and negative feelings and creates a positive outlet for such emotions.
Exercising at the proper time of day for the individual can result in improved sleep.
It is considered an effective treatment for mild to moderate Depression.

How can you add more exercise into your life?

Walk with someone or join a group fitness class. Both of these options, and others, allow for additional mental health bonuses- a social network.
Have fun and be creative dancing- at a club, taking lessons, or a fun fitness class like the latest trend known as Zumba.
Even decluttering your house can reap benefits for both your body and mind. Housework and yard work burn calories and can lift your spirits.

Recipe of the Month:

An Uplifting Feast

Using the ingredients mentioned above, consider trying this meal, remembering to use all of your senses for a mindful experience.

Spicy Pasta

Ingredients

3 tablespoons olive oil
4 garlic cloves, minced
1/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
1 pound common white mushrooms, thinly sliced
1 1/2 cups canned crushed tomatoes or tomato puree
1 jar of Arrabbiata pasta sauce, use as desired
1/8 teaspoon dried rosemary crumbled
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 pound linguine
Grated Parmesan cheese to taste

Directions

Bring a large quantity of water to a boil in a stockpot. To make the sauce, heat the olive oil in a medium-size saucepan over medium heat. Add the garlic and crushed red pepper flakes, and cook 30 seconds. Optional: use Arrabbiata pasta sauce instead of making or if you desire additional sauce. Stir in the mushrooms and cook until brown and juicy, about 10 minutes. Mix in the tomatoes, rosemary, and salt, and cook, stirring often, for 10 minutes. If the sauce begins to splatter during cooking, lower the heat to medium-low. Keep the sauce warm while cooking the linguine.

Drop the linguine into the boiling water and cook until al dente. Taste one along the way to avoid overcooking it. Drain thoroughly in a colander and return to the pot. Pour on the sauce and toss. Serve with a light sprinkling of Parmesan cheese.

Grilled Salmon Salad

Ingredients

5 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
1 salmon fillet
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
1 cup mixed greens
1/4 cup grape tomatoes
2 tablespoons dried cherries
2 tablespoons pine nuts
5 small broccoli florets
Handful of blueberries
2 tablespoons champagne vinegar
1 teaspoon chopped fresh chives
1 slice bread, brushed with olive oil and toasted, for serving

Directions

Heat 1 tablespoon olive oil in a skillet over medium-high heat. Sprinkle the salmon with salt and pepper. Add the salmon to the hot skillet and cook for 7 minutes on each side. Remove from the heat.

Combine the mixed greens, tomatoes, dried cherries, pine nuts, broccoli and blueberries together in a bowl. Whisk together the remaining 4 tablespoons olive oil, vinegar and chives. Season with salt and pepper and pour half over the salad. Place the salmon on top of the salad and pour over the remaining dressing. Serve with toasted bread on the side.

This recipe was created by a contestant during a cooking competition. The Food Network Kitchens have not tested it for home use, therefore, we cannot make any representation as to the results.

Dessert: Ice Cream with Bananas and Chocolate

Ingredients

½ cup low, fat vanilla ice cream

1 tsp chocolate sauce

½ banana

Directions

Slice ½ banana into small pieces. Heat chocolate sauce as desired. Pour chocolate sauce over banana slices and ice cream. Enjoy!