Written by:   Jay Bernath (Sherpa to 5 crazy girls for Ironman Florida 2012)

After months of training, their day was here, But for a sherpa, a time to fear.
As a warning . . .   This tale may seem to be quite unreal, But hang with this group, you’ll soon know the deal.
October 31st, the day we left for the feat, When the rest of the world all went Trick or Treat.
To Ironman Florida, in Panama City Beach, Where 17 hours is the mark you can’t breach.

On the drive, every ache and pain felt through the year, Came back with a vengeance as the race, it was near.
We arrived at Boardwalk Resort, all in Room 6- 0 -0 –  All so excited, stress running low – not!
There were signs on the walls and flowers in a vase, And mountains of food to get through the race.
See you must never look in the fridge of an Ironman freak, It would scare you to death, it’s not for the meek.

It was soon time for dinner, chose Hammerhead Fred’s.  Came back at 8 – still late for bed.
Up the next morning for an early swimming gig – All walking past the mirrors thinking “Does this wetsuit my ass look big?”
It’s hard to believe what they next sought out to do, A 112 mile car ride just to see what they’d soon go through.
Then they came back and began to soak one by one.   it’s what these people do, it’s what they do for fun?!?

Now time for dinner and they all started to cook.  Something called quinoa – but it looked like gook.
They looked at the schedule to see where in the morn they must be, Upset when they realized the pancake breakfast would not be gluten free.
They started to pack their bags, a nerve-wracking chore, As their gear began to overtake the entire condo floor.
Green bags and red bags, yellow and blue, Bottles and tickets and still they weren’t through.
Helmets and goggles and wet suits to find, And soon they were exhausted and began to unwind.
Off to the pre race talk went the newbies like they’re supposed to do.  When they left the others laughed so hard I think they turned blue.

Then another soak and then time for bed – They all seemed on edge, but I think it was dread.
The next morning, last minute supplies – to the nearest store, And Dunkin’ Donuts coffee was the sherpa’s next chore.
The girls thought about dinner – roasted chicken – their pick – Slow down, its only lunch, these girls are sick!
Then the girls started tossing their hair around all as a team. And talking about something they called Hoo Ha cream?
“I put it here, I put it there,” is what they all did say.  With this much estrogen flowing – stay out their way!

Soon it was time to take the bikes and bags to the start. So they loaded down the Sherpa, like he was a baggage cart.
The newbies had their check lists – they went to the extreme.  Their walls and doors were covered – crazy it did seem.!!
With not much sleep, they awoke; now time for the race, To conquer the course, all fears to face.
The day would consist of swim, bike and run, And yes, don’t forget, they do this for fun.
They endured the aches as well as the pain; they endured the wind, but thankfully no rain.
As I watched the race, waiting for the day to be through, I raised my cup of beer in a toast –

Now that’s what smart people do.
Everyone finished, they all crossed the line, with smiles and tears, happy with their time.
The night was tough, but there was one last chore, up at four for the finisher’s store.
The finishers entered at a fervent pace, Forgot their pain, this  the real race.
You see, if you finish you HAVE to purchase the swag, whether a jacket or a shirt, even an Ironman rag.

As a Sherpa, you think you are finally through, When there is still one more job that you must you.
To massage their legs, yes, it’s quite insane, as they scream “It hurts good” ‘I can take the pain.”
To bed they go, their time away almost done.  They all have their medals, they all have won.
See, it’s who they are, it’s part of their soul, to reach the finish, the ultimate goal,
To struggle and fight, to do all they can, To hear the crowd cheer,

“You are an Ironman!”